The Hardest Part

Before today, if you had asked me what the hardest part of fostering is, I would have said it was letting them go to be adopted. I would have been wrong. Last night we lost Chunk.

We've had 22 fosters come through our home and he's the first one that we lost. He had been with us for 11 weeks, since the day after he was born. He'd had been very sick but we had nursed him back to health. He was doing so much better and we thought he would be on his way to the big 2 pound mark and get his surgery soon. Then, yesterday, he suddenly became very ill. We did all the things that you're supposed to do with a failing kitten but we lost him anyway.

From the first day we brought his litter home, I was smitten with him. He was my lil buddy. He would always come straight to me when I sat down in the floor and snuggle up in my lap. You can't help it. You know you can't keep all of these kittens but you fall in love anyway and he was our 'favorite' out of this litter.

It's been a really hard night. I keep thinking of all the coulda, shoulda, woulda's that might have saved him. But I know in my heart that we did everything right and most importantly, he knew he was loved. He didn't die on the streets or alone in a cage. He wasn't euthanized because there was no room for him in a shelter. Chunk spent the last few hours of his life in our arms, with a family that loved him. He was a sweet, loving lil boy and we will miss him so much.

My daughter was so upset that Chunk didn't get the chance to find his Forever Home. I assured her that he did. We were his forever home.

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